We celebrated a beautiful Saturday by heading downtown to shop for our wedding rings. Bethany engaged in a significant amount of research before our trip so I would approximate we had the rings picked out in under ten minutes. She knew exactly what she had her eye on and found the perfect compliment to her engagement bling, whereas I’ve never been a big jewelry guy and would draw a ring on every day with a Sharpie if I could.
In all seriousness, my jewelry experience extends to a high school class ring purchased my senior year and I never felt comfortable wearing it the two or three times I gave it a chance so it now lies in a drawer under some old soccer socks and Green Lantern underoos. Even though I never wore the ring, I recall bad memories of this clunky object on my hand and I have an overreacted concern of finger jewelry. The good news is I’m not the only person in this world with this freak condition so the ring manufacturers from the fiery pits of Mordor make a lightweight ring for pansies like myself that fit very comfortably. Seeing as how I’m also a also gigantic Gollum fan I’m looking forward to spending the reception in a loin cloth having conversations with myself, eating raw fish, and referring to Bethany as my precious.
While our trip to the jeweler turned out to me uneventful an interesting conversation developed next to us. The woman immediately to our left wore a snowball-sized engagement ring and searched for a wedding band larger than the ring she already had on. Her finger looked like it had one of those candy ring pops, but instead of watermelon this one was flavored as $100,000. While the sales clerk did repeatedly comment that money wouldn’t be a problem for her, I did not catch which athlete, actor, or musician she would be walking down the alter with
Lastly, while our rings were being priced in the back room some dude wearing shorts suddenly became enraged he had to wait three minutes for assistance and demanded to know if anyone had been helped yet. Upon being informed he would be next in line he waited about forty- five more seconds before deciding his softball game meant more to him than his engagement and stormed out the door. Did he honestly think the entire staff spent their Saturday standing around staring at the wall waiting for him to come in? I wish him the best of luck on his second marriage.
That's the latest item on the checklist. Stay tuned for word on the tuxedo hunt
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